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Oct. 9th, 2016 05:44 amhttp://dmxrated.livejournal.com/2015/11/09/
Asked Dad yesterday about that issue he had with FX while working on a deck for him. He said that he never actually bailed out, did see the job through, and that they just don't see eachother anymore because he has no real reason to go visit him anymore after having already sold the catboat. He asked me what brought that up in the first place, and I described a similar situation I had gotten in with kymyit that he had supposedly gotten in with FX before.
( Read more... )
He went on to explain how annoying in general it can be to deal with finicky people like me, and that much I can kinda understand. Would've helped, though, if Chelle were both available and by default able to critique fat girls, so that I wouldn't have to give purely textual instructions for a simple edit like that. However, I do make it very clear from the beginning that I intend to request changes halfway through the job, in order to get the best finished product possible in the end. I remember, only months after I took to commissioning, coming across someone's info page in Anime Commissions, who said that they will bump someone back in line for bugging them once about their work, cancel their work for the second meddle, and block them altogether for the third time. Needless to say, I didn't bother with that guy.
More importantly, though, he asked me why I even have to commission people to draw things for me instead of picking up a pencil and learning how to draw my own stuff, especially when the Internet is full of stuff to look at. I told him I already tried it before, and commissioning is just a lot more efficient for me, considering how much and how well I'm able to do versus what I would really rather be doing at any one time, and especially since I have money to spare and nothing particularly important to save up for. Also, not everything can just be Googled for; I don't look for images in general for something, but down to specific criteria. (Case in point: There are almost zero Lucky Star beehive-hairstyle pics anywhere that I had nothing to do with.) I mentioned how he used to play drums years ago, but he said that he did that a lot, compared to how much he sees me doing anything productive.
At that point, I just left, because I didn't know how to explain the whole situation to him in such a way that he'd understand isn't a simple matter of deciding just to get down to something. I already spent years before trying to learn Japanese, reading the same three books and several other sources, without being able to retain anything because I never had the energy to "just try harder." Yes, it's easy to tell me just to get down to business when he doesn't know my situation, my past experiences, and how my brain functions. I do more than just play video games. I revise the story outlines for Starbound and Parasitic Trio and the game mechanics for Lucky Star: Day of the Beehive rather continually. I would write more of Starbound if I had any energy to focus on Lucky Star, which I haven't for a year, which is why I wanted to focus instead on the Cibus project, except that Chelle's been indisposed and I could never to this day find anyone else to discuss it meaningfully, which is why I eventually revived Parasitic Trio. I had a good time writing more to that then, but eventually lost the drive because I knew that, with Jake unable for more than a month to re-write everything for consistency with the existing chapters (my own writing style and ideas were insufficient for that, if you ask me), I'd feel like all I'd be doing was walking through a desert with nothing in sight. Right now, I've had some stuff of Jake's to focus on that he needed help with, and want to take care of that before coming back to PT, and there's also something else I've been doing that I intend to explain on Christmas morning before everyone wakes up.
The first thing presented here is a perfect analogy:
http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-5-most-useless-pieces-advice-everyone-gives/
Walked one lap up and down Masem Court, before noticing Mom under the pine trees. She asked me about the situation, explained that FX did in fact get on Dad's case at one point (which annoyed him, but he did see the job through anyway), and told me that in his mind, Dad was just having a conversation with me, as opposed to me seeing some kind of show of moral superiority up ahead. Maybe it's easy enough for him to just buckle down, however hard a task at hand may be, but he's not autistic and has no business dishing out advice regarding a situation that only someone like Chelle can truly wrap their head around.
I did reconcile with him afterwards, and he did admit he was just throwing his advice out there.
Also showed Mom that exchange between me and kymyit, since that came up along the way. She told me I was rather critical in general. At her advice, I wrote a heartfelt email to apologize for getting on her case and praise her for her work overall.
-----
Watched all six remaining episodes of Selector Spread WIXOSS last night, finishing up at 10:28, the latest I've stayed up to this point before my class begins. Gonna do the same tonight with Divine Gate.
Asked Dad yesterday about that issue he had with FX while working on a deck for him. He said that he never actually bailed out, did see the job through, and that they just don't see eachother anymore because he has no real reason to go visit him anymore after having already sold the catboat. He asked me what brought that up in the first place, and I described a similar situation I had gotten in with kymyit that he had supposedly gotten in with FX before.
( Read more... )
He went on to explain how annoying in general it can be to deal with finicky people like me, and that much I can kinda understand. Would've helped, though, if Chelle were both available and by default able to critique fat girls, so that I wouldn't have to give purely textual instructions for a simple edit like that. However, I do make it very clear from the beginning that I intend to request changes halfway through the job, in order to get the best finished product possible in the end. I remember, only months after I took to commissioning, coming across someone's info page in Anime Commissions, who said that they will bump someone back in line for bugging them once about their work, cancel their work for the second meddle, and block them altogether for the third time. Needless to say, I didn't bother with that guy.
More importantly, though, he asked me why I even have to commission people to draw things for me instead of picking up a pencil and learning how to draw my own stuff, especially when the Internet is full of stuff to look at. I told him I already tried it before, and commissioning is just a lot more efficient for me, considering how much and how well I'm able to do versus what I would really rather be doing at any one time, and especially since I have money to spare and nothing particularly important to save up for. Also, not everything can just be Googled for; I don't look for images in general for something, but down to specific criteria. (Case in point: There are almost zero Lucky Star beehive-hairstyle pics anywhere that I had nothing to do with.) I mentioned how he used to play drums years ago, but he said that he did that a lot, compared to how much he sees me doing anything productive.
At that point, I just left, because I didn't know how to explain the whole situation to him in such a way that he'd understand isn't a simple matter of deciding just to get down to something. I already spent years before trying to learn Japanese, reading the same three books and several other sources, without being able to retain anything because I never had the energy to "just try harder." Yes, it's easy to tell me just to get down to business when he doesn't know my situation, my past experiences, and how my brain functions. I do more than just play video games. I revise the story outlines for Starbound and Parasitic Trio and the game mechanics for Lucky Star: Day of the Beehive rather continually. I would write more of Starbound if I had any energy to focus on Lucky Star, which I haven't for a year, which is why I wanted to focus instead on the Cibus project, except that Chelle's been indisposed and I could never to this day find anyone else to discuss it meaningfully, which is why I eventually revived Parasitic Trio. I had a good time writing more to that then, but eventually lost the drive because I knew that, with Jake unable for more than a month to re-write everything for consistency with the existing chapters (my own writing style and ideas were insufficient for that, if you ask me), I'd feel like all I'd be doing was walking through a desert with nothing in sight. Right now, I've had some stuff of Jake's to focus on that he needed help with, and want to take care of that before coming back to PT, and there's also something else I've been doing that I intend to explain on Christmas morning before everyone wakes up.
The first thing presented here is a perfect analogy:
http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-5-most-useless-pieces-advice-everyone-gives/
Walked one lap up and down Masem Court, before noticing Mom under the pine trees. She asked me about the situation, explained that FX did in fact get on Dad's case at one point (which annoyed him, but he did see the job through anyway), and told me that in his mind, Dad was just having a conversation with me, as opposed to me seeing some kind of show of moral superiority up ahead. Maybe it's easy enough for him to just buckle down, however hard a task at hand may be, but he's not autistic and has no business dishing out advice regarding a situation that only someone like Chelle can truly wrap their head around.
I did reconcile with him afterwards, and he did admit he was just throwing his advice out there.
Also showed Mom that exchange between me and kymyit, since that came up along the way. She told me I was rather critical in general. At her advice, I wrote a heartfelt email to apologize for getting on her case and praise her for her work overall.
-----
Watched all six remaining episodes of Selector Spread WIXOSS last night, finishing up at 10:28, the latest I've stayed up to this point before my class begins. Gonna do the same tonight with Divine Gate.