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I'm done trying.
Mar. 15th, 2018 06:02 pmSent Jake one last email the other day, asking him to promise that we eventually can go over my actual issues whenever he's gotten his life back under control. Having since thought things over, though, there wouldn't be any point. Even if we did, the only purpose behind that would be proper reconciliation, which itself is a moot point because we barely have any basis left for friendship itself. I abandoned Monster Collection Chronicles years ago, I'm slow to take things up that he recommends to me, most of his fanfiction doesn't hold my interest, he hates most things I'm into these days, and whereas he is still hypersexual, I find myself more inclined towards certain fetishes than pornography proper.
So, here I go now, after having said certain things both here and to him about the possibility of a second chance he might give later. (Granted, it's not like anyone ever does account for such possibilities before they happen, but still...)
What I wanted to make sense of, was why he requested all kinds of stuff to make happen in Unwilling Service if he actually hated it so much. He wanted Mewtwo to Mega Evolve a certain way (can't remember between his X or Y forms), he wanted Dawn to try being a nudist like the protagonists and to participate in the Pal Park, he wanted Jamie to be naked upon meeting each of the Pokemon Idols, and even when he admitted his lack of interest in gym quests, he still went on to suggest ways to make it more interesting, asked to see my first entry about the story, requested a trial run of the Pal Park, and asked that each of the mains have a rival to compete against for that event. All of that, on top of requesting that I go through my blog to tag each entry where I talked about Pokemon, mentioning someone who found the premise amusing, sharing certain things with me like that tabletop game and something about parallel universes, and before I previously abandoned it, asking me to find it within me to care about it again. He even said yes when I asked if he'd ever be interested in a hypothetical visual adaptation of some sort.
That's what I mean when I talk about any interest he displayed up until telling me he can't do it anymore, not just because of his lifestyle, but because he couldn't stand all the halfway measures we had to make. Can you say, "two-faced hypocrisy?"
With some effort, I got him to specify a few of those, and offered to concede two of them just for a start, but he refused. I hope this has something to do with a lack of spoons due to how busy his life is, because this sounds like he wanted me just to cater to all his demands verbatim the first time and now he's being a spoilsport because he couldn't have his way the first time each.
Why I wanted him at least to be able to enjoy it? Well, he said he liked the idea that started it all, and I thought he was into it enough for other reasons of his. Because I cared about him as a friend who might've enjoyed it, if only he was able to accept any decisions of mine that he might disagree with, or else negotiate with me what I'd be willing to do to retain his favor.
That's the whole gist of it. His loss; if he's gonna act like this, then yes, I'll be more than happy just to move on without him.
It's funny, how a story that he managed to inspire, through the first potential one we ever talked about, eventually became the very bane of our friendship.
Well, short of winning him back on board, the whole point of trying to make sense of what happened would be to determine whether he's even worth keeping around as a friend, but if we actually do reconcile, then what? The way things played out, he already cut me off for something I said for the right reasons but at the wrong time, so all that's really left now is to wrap things up right here online. (If anything, though, I'd still be interested in the Yoshi's Island fic, and I might alert him when Davì finally debuts in Starbound, just in case.)
(Jake, feel free to clear anything up I might be misunderstanding here if you ever decide to. Pissed as I am about this, I'll still miss the things we talked about up until almost a year ago.)
So, here I go now, after having said certain things both here and to him about the possibility of a second chance he might give later. (Granted, it's not like anyone ever does account for such possibilities before they happen, but still...)
What I wanted to make sense of, was why he requested all kinds of stuff to make happen in Unwilling Service if he actually hated it so much. He wanted Mewtwo to Mega Evolve a certain way (can't remember between his X or Y forms), he wanted Dawn to try being a nudist like the protagonists and to participate in the Pal Park, he wanted Jamie to be naked upon meeting each of the Pokemon Idols, and even when he admitted his lack of interest in gym quests, he still went on to suggest ways to make it more interesting, asked to see my first entry about the story, requested a trial run of the Pal Park, and asked that each of the mains have a rival to compete against for that event. All of that, on top of requesting that I go through my blog to tag each entry where I talked about Pokemon, mentioning someone who found the premise amusing, sharing certain things with me like that tabletop game and something about parallel universes, and before I previously abandoned it, asking me to find it within me to care about it again. He even said yes when I asked if he'd ever be interested in a hypothetical visual adaptation of some sort.
That's what I mean when I talk about any interest he displayed up until telling me he can't do it anymore, not just because of his lifestyle, but because he couldn't stand all the halfway measures we had to make. Can you say, "two-faced hypocrisy?"
With some effort, I got him to specify a few of those, and offered to concede two of them just for a start, but he refused. I hope this has something to do with a lack of spoons due to how busy his life is, because this sounds like he wanted me just to cater to all his demands verbatim the first time and now he's being a spoilsport because he couldn't have his way the first time each.
Why I wanted him at least to be able to enjoy it? Well, he said he liked the idea that started it all, and I thought he was into it enough for other reasons of his. Because I cared about him as a friend who might've enjoyed it, if only he was able to accept any decisions of mine that he might disagree with, or else negotiate with me what I'd be willing to do to retain his favor.
That's the whole gist of it. His loss; if he's gonna act like this, then yes, I'll be more than happy just to move on without him.
It's funny, how a story that he managed to inspire, through the first potential one we ever talked about, eventually became the very bane of our friendship.
Well, short of winning him back on board, the whole point of trying to make sense of what happened would be to determine whether he's even worth keeping around as a friend, but if we actually do reconcile, then what? The way things played out, he already cut me off for something I said for the right reasons but at the wrong time, so all that's really left now is to wrap things up right here online. (If anything, though, I'd still be interested in the Yoshi's Island fic, and I might alert him when Davì finally debuts in Starbound, just in case.)
(Jake, feel free to clear anything up I might be misunderstanding here if you ever decide to. Pissed as I am about this, I'll still miss the things we talked about up until almost a year ago.)